What I learned from my toddler

Toddlers fall asleep in the car 5 minutes before you get home and wake up when you transfer them to their crib

Toddlers do not “relax” when in the bathtub – it will not make them sleepy

Toddlers like the food you give them one minute and don’t want it the next

Toddlers cry because they can

Toddlers have no modesty or manners

Toddlers like the word “no”

Toddlers love unraveling the toilet paper just as much as playing with a $300 toy

Toddlers don’t have a “quiet voice”

Toddlers don’t want to shop – even for cute clothes

Toddlers don’t want to try anything on – not even cute clothes

Toddlers will get a bruise or a scratch on their face the day before you get professional photographs taken

Toddlers will wait to throw a temper tantrum until you are in public (they really prefer to wait until you are in a long line at the grocery store with a large cart of groceries)

Toddlers learn bad habits faster than good ones

Toddlers put everything in their mouths (bugs, cat food, etc.)

Toddlers have an unreasonable fear of Kleenex and cry the second it comes near their nose.