Big Poop Incident

Big Poop Incident

It took me a couple of weeks to be able to post this story. I had to wait for the trauma to wear off before I could see any humor in this incident.

The afternoon started off well. Molly was taking a nap (or so I thought). It was quiet and I was able to surf the Internet and read my favorite adoption blogs. After about an hour and a half, I look in on my baby and am horrified by what I see. Molly is playing in her toddler bed. Why does this bother me? It’s not that she is playing when she should be sleeping. It is what she is playing with. Molly has taken off her pants and her diaper, which was a poopie one and has decided to use the poop as fingerpaints! Her hands are covered in poop, her sheets are covered in poop that she has grounded into a big circular mess (her masterpiece, watch out Picasso). To make matters worse, Molly never has normal poop, it is always a little on the runny side (which helps with her poop art work, I guess – better consistency for fingerpaint).

Anyway, I am standing in the doorway wondering what to do. She is covered in poop. How do I get it off of her? Do I even want to touch her? Does HazMad respond to cases like this? Where is SuperNanny when I need her?

I go into the room and find that under her armpits are clean so I pick her up (at arms length and nose averted), but now what do I do with her? I plop her into the bathtub. I still don’t know where to begin because I have to get the poop off before I give her the bath or she will just be taking a bath in poopie water (and I would still be sticking my hands in the poopie water!) So I begin by peeling the sheets off her bed and throwing them away! She is still in the bathtub, not saying a word or moving. She is still partially clothed (no diaper or pants, but shirt and sweater are on) and there is no water in the tub, so she is safe while I am ripping her room apart. Fortunately all the stuff animals survived the poop explosion and were clean (I was yelling from the bedroom “any animals with poop are going in the garbage!) Molly and her sheets appear to be the only casualties (although the tub won’t be looking good soon!)

I go back into the bathroom to prepare my de-pooping of Molly. She is still staying very still (she knows Mommy is not happy). Fortunately the hair is poop free and so is her face (at least it appears she didn’t eat any of it!) I begin with wipes on her hands and I get off most of it, but not all (I swear it was ground into her skin). I also work on her legs and feet. I peel off her shirt and sweater which appear to be salvageable. Finally I run the water and wash a subdued baby. I wash her twice, then dress in her in jammies and put her back in a clean bed. She naps for the next 2 hours. I guess all the poop coloring tired her out. I spent the next ½ hour cleaning and disinfecting the tub. Then ½ an hour in the shower washing myself!

I was not a happy mommy! Now I am just hoping that this was a one time occurrence.

I did not get any pictures of the incident (I was too busy), but I did post a few from her ballet class.

(My dear little Molly, posting this little story is payback. You will understand when you are embarrassed by this as a teenager!)